You’ve just met a guy. He’s interesting, funny, sarcastic and hot! Life is good. You exchange numbers and start texting each other. “So gr8 to meet U!” “U2!”
You hang out a few times and keep texting back and forth for a couple of weeks. Then the texts start to taper off and finally disappear. You sit there wondering, “Why did he stop texting me? Was it something I did?” While no one can ever know the full reasons, the easiest answer is “yes” and “no.”
First Possible Reason:
Men aren’t really communicators. We aren’t taught how to be expressive and to communicate and share the way women are. Some of it is nature and some of it is nurture. For instance, depending on the study you use, women use around 30,000 words/day whereas men us 10,000 words/day. Very rarely do men text back and forth with other men. If we do, it’s direct and exchanging information. So constant texting can start to get annoying for a guy. Here’s an example of a guy-to-guy text exchange:
“Happy hour?”
“Si! Oddfellow’s?”
“Done.”
So if you want to keep a text convo open and rolling, don’t look for long interactions.
Second Possible Reason:
Not enough of a bond built. If you met a guy at a party and got each other’s number and started texting, you’ve probably spent more time texting than you actually did in each other’s company. There wasn’t that much time to build a good connection. So while you are trying to do it by keeping in contact, the emotional pull for him to interact with you lessens to the point that the contact stops. If you want to keep the energy going, you’ve got to meet in person to raise the energy and emotional level and keep meeting. Men aren’t looking for pen pals.
Third Possible Reason:
Something or someone has supplanted you. Most people are talking to/hanging out with/seeing/hooking up with multiple people at the same time. You may be one of 5 girls he’s talking to as he’s probably not the only one you’re in contact with. Perhaps the relationship with one of them is getting stronger and he is cutting others loose. No guy is ever going to send a text that says, “Hey, got more serious with someone else so not going to be texting you anymore.” They will just disappear. And no, it’s not the best way, but it does happen.
Fourth Possible Reason:
You did/said something to annoy or offend him. Maybe you were playfully teasing him about his love for Ariana Grande. The problem is that over text, there is no tone, so he may have read it as you being derisive or dismissive. Or perhaps you mentioned that you’re a Bernie-girl and he is not. It could have been on the last date you showed too much attention and he felt smothered or exactly the opposite. Again, we’ll never know so don’t overanalyze or beat yourself up over something that you have no control over.
The Reason He Definitely Did NOT Stop Texting You:
He got busy. This is B.S. Everyone is busy. If a man really likes a woman, he will find time to text her. Even if he’s a neurosurgeon, he’ll find time in between patients to send a quick: “thinking of you!” If you haven’t heard from him in a week or more, don’t make mental excuses that he was busy.
About The Author
Hunt Ethridge is a Dating and Relationship expert who has helped hundreds of men and women over the last decade. He is the founder of International Dating Coach Association and has written over 100 articles across all mediums on the subject of dating and love. You can find more of Hunt's advice at HuntForAdvice.com.
I am the perfect dating coach to answer this question. I hate to admit this, but I probably go on Facebook 10 times a day for scrolling purposes and I am a man who used to pursue women on Facebook. (I actually got a first date via messaging my current girlfriend on Facebook)
Here is exactly what happens when a woman posts a half naked picture like the one below on Facebook:
1. Man internally says either, "Gross, not attracted to you" or "I want to have sex with you"
If man says the latter, he either keeps scrolling or sends the girl a message.
The "message guy's" only intention right now is what is the fastest and easiest way to get this woman into bed. Even if it comes in the form of "Long time no talk, how are you? What is new" or any variation of this message.
Since we are no longer caveman and can't do the following:
men now resort to a civilized socially acceptable offering of sex.
Now, chances are, you are going to get a few dates from a bathing suit picture. You are going to think, wow, posting these pictures really works. However, what happens on these dates? Does the guy try to take you home in the first night? Although I do believe that men do look for sex and find love while women are the opposite, there is a better way to get a more high quality date through Facebook.
Try a picture like this:
This woman look beautiful and is extremely appealing to most men. Most importantly she is not showing off cleavage, her but, or anything scandalous. She is simply pretty and classy. Her outfit maybe even suggests that she is the girl next door. The girl next door is usually a woman that needs to be courted. She needs to feel special, respected, and cherished. When all these things happen, and she feels comfortable, then and only then can a relationship become sexual.
Bottom line, if you want a husband
Do - Post pictures where you look beautiful, classy, sexy and sophisticated
Don't - Post pictures where you show off skin
