Have you ever been present when a couple fights? Was it extremely awkward? I was present for a close friend screaming back and forth with his girlfriend. I remember pondering, "Man, I wonder if these two are going to make it?"
Almost ten years later, they are happily married with a child which begs the question, "How are they solving conflicts now?"
My friend, not a dating expert, psychologist, or anything else relevant gave some pretty damn good advice. Check it out:
1. Stop Drinking Vodka
2. Don't Scream/Curse/Name-Call. It tends to make you the asshole even if you're right about the initial disagreement
3. Take your losses, you don't have to win every fight
4. When apologizing, don't follow with an excuse/explanation. Just Apologize
5. Give both parties time to cool down after a fight. Different people take different amounts of time to get over things.
6. Forgive and accept sincere apologies quickly. Don't be the asshole that holds grudges.
What do you think, good advice? Send me a message and let me know your thoughts.
Story, State and Strategy. Tony Robbins speaks about these Three S's in his book Money: Master The Game and I realized the 3 S's are so relevant to finding love.
Let's get into it.
First, strategy. Let's say you are trying to lose weight. If you are eating ice cream, potato chips, and fried chicken all day it is never going to happen. However, if your friend has lost 80 lbs and has kept it off for years then she probably has a good strategy. All you need to do is emulate what she did.
But, that is probably easier said than done or 70% of Americans wouldn't be considered overweight right?
So, even if I give you the best strategy to meet and keep men, that is only part of the story.
Which leads me to the 2nd S, story. Are you giving yourself a limiting story? "College educated men are 3-1 in my city. All men are liars, just looking to have sex. All the good guys are taken, and so on."
With that story, you are putting yourself into a state that is setup for failure. The story is a self fulfilling prophecy.
However, what if you decided, right now, that you will no longer stand for being single. What if you declared with authority, that you are going to do whatever you need to do to meet the love of your life.
Do you think these statements may change your state? If you have this attitude, do you think it even matters that finding love is hard? No, it doesn't matter because you have committed to doing whatever it takes. You are going to do it!
Takeaway: If you are going to do anything that is difficult, make sure your strategy, state, and story are all aligned for success.
