How To Know If You Are In An Exclusive Relationship

Imagine yourself newly dating a really great guy--the type of guy who makes your heart skip a beat! The guy who meets all the criteria on your checklist and more.

The guy who has been taking you out to fabulous dinners, texting you daily, and sending flowers to your office. You can't wait to bring him home to mom and dad--until you realize you are going to have to wait! Because after stalking his Facebook page, you see the writing on the wall: He is dating other people! Horrified, you consider blocking him for good but instead send him a screenshot of the "evidence". (Caption. "WTF?? *Sigh* *Sad Face*)

You are hoping for some kind of explanation. Is this a joke? Did someone hack his account? Nope! When you ask him to spill it, he apologizes and accuses you of being "crazy". Mostly, you get the response from a man who thinks he did no wrong. "It's not like we are exclusive", he says. He's right. Sadly, he can date whoever he wants-whenever he wants-because the two or you never became an official couple. Sorry, girlfriend, you have broken the cardinal rule of dating: You can not assume you are exclusive unless a guy tells you they he wants to be exclusive with you.

Note: Unless he clearly states that he wants to be in a committed, monogamous relationship with you, assume that there's a good chance he's still seeing other women--as in talking to, dating, and sleeping with. One thing is for sure: If a man really wants to be in a serious relationship with you , he wants to lock it down. He wants to know that he's investing his time, energy, and money into a woman who is investing her own in him and him only. He doesn't want to compete for your affection anymore. He wants you to be his girlfriend. He wants to shout it from the rooftops or, umm, at least on social media. Ideally, you wouldn't have to ask him if he wants to be exclusive. Ideally, he'd leave no doubt in your mine. But even some good relationship-oriented guys are imperfect, afraid of rejection, and could use a little nudge. If this sounds like the guy you are dating and you want to take things to the next level, tell him.

Let him know your feelings but don't assume that you are exclusive just because you told him you want to be. The only thing you have to go by is his word. The moment he tells you he wants to be exclusive is the moment you know you're exclusive. And then you can start looking at his actions. Because they really do speak louder than words!

Who Is Your Author?

Rachel Russo, MS, MFT is a Matchmaker, Dating & Relationship Coach, Author & Speaker. She has a master’s degree in Marriage & Family Therapy from Iona College, a BA in Psychology from Rutgers University, and a certification as an Intentional Relationship Coach. Rachel is the founder of Rachel Russo Relationships-a NYC-based dating and relationship consultancy-and has worked as a matchmaker for eleven years. Rachel is the author of two books: A Fab Job Guide To Become A Matchmaker and How To Get Over Your Ex: A Step By Step Guide To Mend A Broken Heart Italian American Style. Rachel has pretty much earned her PhD in men—many thanks to a reality-date-a-thon in which she went on ninety-two dates in one year and blogged about them. For more dating and relationship advice, check out www.RachelRusso.com

What Women Should Expect From Men In the Early Stages of Dating

Ah, the honeymoon!

When it comes to dating, we generally regard the early stages of seeing someone to be a time of relational bliss. It is the period of a relationship that is, at best, defined by lust, infatuation, and, of course, many exciting firsts. At worst, its the "good old days" a couple looks back on as the time before everything went.....downhill.

If you are looking to be in a healthy, happy, and sustainable relationship, there are things that you should look for as norms. In other words, if you and your partner are experiencing the following, you are probably on the right track......

Best Behavior: In the beginning, "normal" relationships consist of two imperfect people on their best, most perfect behavior. This is a time of chivalry, good manners, proper dating etiquette-think dates planned far in advance- and a sweeping any potential problems under the rug.

The dates within the first few months are generally more of the four or five star restaurant variety and less Chipotle and Netflix on the couch. Its a time in which both parties make an effort to look their best. Legs are shaved; sweats are left in the drawer. There are calls just to say "hi" and daily good morning texts.

Whether you have you partner on a pedestal as someone who could do no wrong or are just enjoying the fact that you haven't seen any "red flags" yet. you are thrilled at how well everything is going.

Sexual Attraction: At the start of a relationship that is going somewhere, you can't get enough of each other! There is such a sexual energy in the air! You are so physically attracted to each other. You feel a spark,butterflies, and the greatest excitement over, say, just brushing up against him or her. For some, the chemistry is so strong that they can barely keep their hands off each other. That's right: You feel like you are making out all over town, because you are! And if you are holding off on sleeping with each other, your hormones can make you feel like you are going crazy.

You should be crazy for each other. Its all so new and exciting; the early days are definitely the time to feel the sexual attraction. Sure, attraction can develop in time, but for most couples who keep that flame burning for decades and decades, the spark was there early on.

Want the honeymoon to last forever? For some couples, it can! For more dating and relationship advice, check out www.RachelRusso.com

Rachel Russo, MS, MFT is a Matchmaker, Dating & Relationship Coach, Author & Speaker. She has a master’s degree in Marriage & Family Therapy from Iona College, a BA in Psychology from Rutgers University, and a certification as an Intentional Relationship Coach. Rachel is the founder of Rachel Russo Relationships-a NYC-based dating and relationship consultancy-and has worked as a matchmaker for eleven years. Rachel is the author of two books: A Fab Job Guide To Become A Matchmaker and How To Get Over Your Ex: A Step By Step Guide To Mend A Broken Heart Italian American Style. Rachel has pretty much earned her PhD in men—many thanks to a reality-date-a-thon in which she went on ninety-two dates in one year and blogged about them.

How to Flirt via Text: 9 Texts to Send To Your Guy to Make You Irresistible

Have you ever wondered about what texts you should send to make a man feel crazy about you? Have you stressed about sending the "perfect" text to make him feel special?

Agonized over what to text to win him back? Girl, we have all been there!

While texting shouldn't be the primary form of communication if your goal is to form a healthy, happy, long-term relationship, giving great text can definitely move thinks along. Here are nine texts any man will find irresistible.

1. Hey Handsome: This is a fun and playful text that makes him feel like a stud. Why? Because men are more insecure about their looks than you could ever imagine.

2. Good Morning Sunshine! I just woke up to the craziest dream about you. Bonus: Share the dream! What guy wouldn't want to know you spent the night dreaming of him and woke up thinking about him? Note: Don't send this text unless you've actually had a dream about a man!

3. Goodnight (Insert name/pet name): A man loves to know that he's the one you go to bed thinking about!

4. Just saw _____, and it made me think of you. This is a simple reminder that lets him know that he's on your mind.

5. A cute photo of you with a caption about something that you are currently doing. It need not be sexual. If a guy is really into you, he will appreciate a candid, silly image. But while you are at it..............

6. A sext: It doesn't hurt to send a sexy text or two! Something along the lines of "I'm not wearing any underwear and....." could work wonders. Be careful about sending racy photos. You have to really trust the guy....and trust that your images won't end up on the internet.

7. An Open-Ended Question: Men love to feel needed. Your guy will melt once he becomes your-go-to-person for advice. It doesn't matter what you ask him. It could be anything from his recommendation for BBQ restaurants or which space heater you should by.

8. The inappropriate thoughts you would never say out loud: You know that he'll feel special when you send him your most candid, politically incorrect, brutally honest thoughts about every day matters. (Especially if you are usually quite reserved and polite!) Think of yourself as a cartoon character sharing your thought bubble.

9. I love/ miss you: Life is short; you could really never say it enough! If he feels the same way, he will be thrilled to hear it! If his feelings aren't as strong, he will be flattered and more motivated to share his feelings if/when they catch up to yours.

Rachel Russo, MS, MFT is a Matchmaker, Dating & Relationship Coach, Author & Speaker. She has a master’s degree in Marriage & Family Therapy from Iona College, a BA in Psychology from Rutgers University, and a certification as an Intentional Relationship Coach. Rachel is the founder of Rachel Russo Relationships-a NYC-based dating and relationship consultancy-and has worked as a matchmaker for eleven years. Rachel is the author of two books: A Fab Job Guide To Become A Matchmaker and How To Get Over Your Ex: A Step By Step Guide To Mend A Broken Heart Italian American Style. Rachel has pretty much earned her PhD in men—many thanks to a reality-date-a-thon in which she went on ninety-two dates in one year and blogged about them.

More about Rachel at www.RachelRusso.com

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