The short answer is…compatibility! Even though many of us know this to be true, people find themselves searching for the excitement of good chemistry. If you are looking for a long-term relationship, chemistry will make it fun but it’s your compatibility that will make it last. What you need to do is look for the compatibility and let the chemistry grow if it isn’t there right away.
There was a scientific study done where women rated men’s attractiveness based solely upon a photograph. The women would then meet the men, talk to them, and rate them again. What happened time and time again was the score would go up or down depending on if the women liked their personalities. It was concluded that women could change their score up to 4 points depending on if they enjoyed their conversations. How can you use this fact in your everyday life? When you meet a man that you are not necessarily attracted to, don’t write him off right away. Give it some time and see if their personality will make them more attractive to you.
In the video below, EZ Dating Coach, Mike Goldstein, tells us a story about his client, Isabella. After going on a date with a man named Nick, she told Mike that she had a good time but she didn’t feel any chemistry. She thought Nick was smart and she loved talking to him but she just wasn’t attracted to him. Mike suggested that she give him another shot. After going on a bunch of dates with Nick, Isabella called Mike and told him that Nick is the sexiest man alive! She gave him a chance and boy did it pay off! The two have been together ever since and they have been happily married since 2017.
The moral of the story is that it’s ok if you don’t feel instant chemistry with a guy. If you enjoy spending time together, give the guy a shot and let the chemistry build. If the compatibility is there, that will give the relationship the solid foundation that it needs to stand the test of time. It’s ok if the chemistry isn’t there right off the bat. Give it a little time and see what happens.
Wondering if you would be a good fit for coaching with EZ Dating Coach? Book A complimentary 15 minute strategy session HERE and find out. Let's get you a high quality man that will be yours forever.
Has this ever happened to you? You go on a bunch of dates with a guy and things are going great. You enjoy talking and getting to know each other and it really feels like it could be something special. All of a sudden, without warning, BAM! No texts, no phone calls, no smoke signals…nothing! Then, almost as suddenly as he disappeared, he’s back! Where did he go? Why did he disappear like that? Was it something you did?
When men execute these types of disappearing acts, they usually don’t mean to hurt anyone. Nevertheless, it can feel very hurtful to be left behind, wondering what’s wrong. There are many reasons why this happens and there are steps that you can take to help prevent it from happening again. In fact, EZ Dating Coach, Mike Goldstein, has come up with a 2-step process to help you handle these types of issues!
Step 1: find out why he left. Did he have a reasonable and legitimate reason?
Step 2: Come up with a plan to make sure that he doesn’t disappear on you again.
How do you do that? You need to ask him straight up if he’s going to do it again. Feel free to be direct and let him know how it made you feel when he left the way that he did. Next, you must hold him accountable for his actions by asking him what your plan should be if he should do it again.
There’s a big difference between something serious, like a family emergency, and something not so serious, like just wanting to hang out with friends. The former, which most likely will be an isolated incident, means that it was something extreme that required his full attention and focus. Let him know that you were worried and tell him that if anything like that should happen again, you would love it if he could let you know. That way, you wouldn’t get so anxious and you can be there to help if he needs you.
The latter is a completely different story. Hanging out with friends is very important but that doesn’t mean that he should just vanish without a trace. A quick text or phone call letting you know where he is would prevent a world of worry and also show you that you are important to him. When you care about someone, you have to be considerate and respectful of them. You and your feelings should be important to him and vanishing without any word shows a disregard for you and your feelings. You have to let him know how hurtful that is and you have to set that boundary. With that boundary in place, you can make sure that it won’t happen again.
Wondering if you would be a good fit for coaching with EZ Dating Coach? Book A complimentary 15 minute strategy session HERE and find out. Let's get you a high quality man that will be yours forever.
